Josiah Day, Waiting for Baby Bird

God Made Me a Promise. But Perhaps I Got It Wrong.

Today, on Josiah Day, I sat outside his room. Am I pregnant? No. Am I pregnant with hope? Some days I am. Some days it’s a struggle. Today, it's a struggle. (Whew. Deep breath.) It’s been over 8 years since I heard in my spirit that I would have a son and to name him… Continue reading God Made Me a Promise. But Perhaps I Got It Wrong.

Testimonies, Waiting for Baby Bird

“No Heartbeat”: A Story of Loss from a Husband’s Perspective

“No Heartbeat" I can remember the giddy smiles on our faces as we were preparing for our ultrasound appointment. “What are we going to name it if baby Lawler is a girl? How are we going to decorate the room? I think it is a girl from the way I have been feeling, but the… Continue reading “No Heartbeat”: A Story of Loss from a Husband’s Perspective

Josiah Day, Waiting for Baby Bird

She Wants to Be a Big Sister–So She Prays

You would think after five years of nightly dinner time prayers and bedtime pleadings for a sibling that she would stop making her requests. I know there are days I can’t even mutter the words—at least not with the same fiery faith that her prayers contain. However, despite the years that have gone by with… Continue reading She Wants to Be a Big Sister–So She Prays

Waiting for Baby Bird

Grieving the Life You Planned

Vulnerable Post Alert:  Grief hits you at weird moments, doesn't it? For me, it happened this morning as I stood facing my bathroom mirror. I was mindlessly putting on my makeup and getting ready for the day when the thoughts of what I imagined my life would look like recklessly hit me like a Mack… Continue reading Grieving the Life You Planned