The two-week wait has come to an end and it was far less exciting than I had hoped for. There were no cramps or nausea. No food or smell aversions. No extra trips to the ladies room or tender breasts. But most importantly, there were no double lines or a missed period. Unfortunately, my first smile and Daniel’s attempt to pollinate my flower did not result in a pregnancy this cycle. However, as I sit here this afternoon writing “feminine products” on my shopping list, I am not crushed.
This cycle has brought me so much hope for the next, as it was the first time I saw a smile on an ovulation predication test and it was also the first cycle in nine months in which it lasted less than 40 days. All morning long I have been dwelling on these positives and believing that because of the significant changes in my body, God is doing a new thing. In fact, He has affirmed it to me twice. The first affirmation came this morning when I read the following verse in my devotional and then again this afternoon when a friend sent it to me in an email (she was unaware my cycle had begun). The verse reads,
I know many of you might think the ovulation test and shorter cycle could have been a fluke or the scripture was just a coincidence, and honestly it is easy for me to travel down that same thought pattern as well. My logical reasoning says that due to my past cycles, I should be skeptical and doubt that anything has changed or will be different next month, but I’m not going with my logical reasoning. I am choosing faith and as hard as it is, I am looking at verse 18 and forgetting about my former past of long, anovulatory cycles and instead looking forward with hope that my cycle lengths are becoming more regular and ovulation will forever be a natural occurrence as God is doing new things! I believe that He is bringing complete healing to my body and making a way in my dry and barren land for conception to take place and soon. You may not perceive it, but I do! This is why when I go to the grocery store in five minutes, I am buying the smallest box of “feminine products” I can find because I am trusting that He will continue to do new things so that I am able to add another “first” to my list next month…my first missed period.