Nearly a year ago, I was contacted by a spokesperson from OvuSense to, free of charge, test their product, which is a fertility monitor, in exchange for an honest review of their product. I realize their offer sounds golden, right? Ehhh. Not to me. You see, I am not big on testing products and writing reviews; therefore, my answer was an immediate no. I am sure my quick response shocked the sweet woman asking because who says no to a FREE device (typically $100+monthly subscription fees) and has shockingly high success rates of achieving pregnancy, especially with women like myself who have been diagnosed with severe PCOS?
Apparently, this girl.
But OvuSense did not take no for an answer because she contacted me again with the same request; test out their product, free of charge, in exchange for an honest review. But once again, my answer was a strict nope-ask someone else. I haven’t tracked my ovulation in nearly two years, and honestly? It’s been liberating! No more charts. No more analyzing. No more guessing. No more frustration. No more OPK’s that take a college degree to read. Just living the naive life and believing in faith, the “special” time I did have with my husband was enough. Besides, the “Quick! It’s time! It’s time!” was making everything more of a job, ya know?
But friends, one day while reading numerous posts in those trying to conceive Facebook groups from women stating they were struggling to know if and when they ovulate, I got to thinking about you, my loyal readers; and how if I tested out the product and it proved to be as amaze-balls as the articles, blogs, and reviews claim it to be, then how life-changing it could be for you! It could be incredible, right?! So a couple of weeks ago, I contacted the determined OvuSense spokeswoman and let her know that it was time. Time for me to give this thingy-ma-jig a try.
If you are not familiar with Ovusense, then let me educate you for a moment. This device is to be used at night while you sleep to record your core body temperature every 5 minutes to provide you with an accurate measurement. With this measuring, the device claims to be able to predict ovulation up to a day in advance (perfect for you type-A planners) and detect the exact date of when you ovulate, with clinically proven 99% accuracy. Crazy cool, right?! I thoughts so too. Especially for a woman like myself, who have been diagnosed with PCOS.
But guess what?! To be completely transparent, I didn’t know any of that when I told the company I would give this device a chance. In fact, I had no idea what it would look like or what to expect. Well, I take that back. While I didn’t know what it would look like or how it worked, I did know what to expect. And that is a success! Because before I gave my official “yes” to give it a try, I joined a closed Facebook group of other women who are using this advanced mechanism, and goodness! The amount of pregnancies being announced to the credit of using this device is overwhelming. Women who have PCOS, and those with long cycles, short cycles, no cycles, and even couples who have been trying for YEARS to grow their family by two-feet with no success were having their magical movie moment of seeing those precious two pink lines! One.After.Another. During my time of stalking this group, I kept thinking that it must either be a sham (skeptic), or it is what the women claim it to be: A miracle device EVERYONE struggling to conceive MUST get their hands on.
But anyway, back to the package!
It arrived last week, and I literally squealed with excitement when I saw it resting easy on my front porch. I grabbed it, accidentally leaving the rest of the mail behind, and ran inside to rip it open and get familiar with this magical device that was going to either tell me when it is time to get “friendlier” with my husband (insert soft lighting, low music, and bow chicka-wow-wow) or perhaps once again prayerfully seek medical attention as ovulation was not happening. But y’all, I still can’t stop laughing when I think back to that moment when I slowly opened the case (which looks like an eye-glass case) to find a white, oversized sperm looking contraption sitting there. I literally said out loud, “I am to put this where?!”
As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t know what it would look like, but for some reason, I wasn’t expecting that–or the size of “that.” It’s not large, but also not the teeny-tiny device I had imagined. Nevertheless, I knew if I wanted to increase my nearly zero percent chances of seeing those two lines and also help increase yours, inserting “that” into my who-ha nightly was not an option, but a have to. (FYI: the word “who-ha” is one of a million slang terms for vagina–wink, wink)
Once I had passed the initial shock of this sperm look-a-like contraption, I began digging through the rest of the package to see if there were any other fun surprises, such as those little pieces of confetti or even a yummy chocolate bar; but there wasn’t. Bummer. (If you are reading this review OvuSense, adding a little Hershey’s would have been lovely) Therefore without any pieces of bright-colored confetti to later vacuum up or chocolate to nibble on with my afternoon coffee, I moved on to the boring part of this process, figuring out how to use it. I was surprised not to find a booklet but rather a small pamphlet simply giving me safety instructions, which I found obvious. But then again, we do live in a world where there is “CAUTION: It is Hot” on McDonald’s coffee cups (rolls eyes). I mean, I get it. To avoid any legal fees by a consumer, I suppose the company must remind women that not to risk infection, one should keep the device for personal use ONLY. Caring is sharing, ladies, but not so with this. Safety first! So no passing it back and forth as you did with your “Hey, what’s up?” notes during the 6th grade. And nor should you purchase a gently used one-off eBay or those trading pages either. Capiche?
But anyway, back to the pamphlet.
After I read the precautions and did my scout’s honor not to share it, sell it, microwave it, or drop it, I read the most important information of all, and that is how to download and set up the OvuSense App on my phone (this is where you will see your temperature reading each morning and causally view over-analyze your chart maybe once 50 times daily).
As a non-tech person who can barely figure out how to turn down the ringtone on their Samsung Galaxy, I was nervous that I wouldn’t be able to figure it out and consequently need to contact support services (yikes!). However, to my surprise, downloading the app and even setting up the device was fairly easy-peasy! Within minutes I was ready to shove it in…I mean…put it to use, but let’s be real, that did not come without some hesitation and a peak of nervousness!
I am almost embarrassed to type this, but if you could have been inside my head that night, one would have thought I was a virgin! I literally had those same feelings as when I was in the bathroom stall during the 8th grade and inserting a tampon for the first time! EEK! But after a few deep breaths, I realized I could EASILY insert this; because HELLO, not only am I not a virgin, I have also had a bajillion vaginal ultrasounds with that ‘Price is Right’ Bob Barker wand. And so, like a pro, I put on (or in this case took off) my big girl panties, and up, up and away it went. But guess what, friends? As it turns out, inserting the giant sperm-look-a-like contraption was just the beginning of my overly anxious heart!
Part Two of this series, “Oh No! Did it Get Lost Up There?”
For more information regarding this device, please visit their website.
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