I sat on the edge of my bed taking my blood pressure and as I waited to see the numbers, I remember thinking to myself that if it is within normal range than I am finally healed of this symptom resulting from Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). However as the numbers appeared and I saw 160/92, I heard a whisper that said, “Not healed yet.”
Each morning when I would pluck 15 dark coarse hairs from my chin (so embarrassing to even type), I would hear the whispering voice say, “Not healed yet.” And as my menstrual cycle would go past 30 days…then 40 days…and even 50 days, I could hear that same voice quietly reminding me that my body? The one betraying me? Was simply not healed.
At least not yet.
It wasn’t until I looked in the mirror one day while wondering when I would be healed of this dreaded illness that consumes my entire being and robs me of my ability to grow my family, that I heard a different voice…a different whisper. This one said, “Daughter, by My Son’s wounds you ARE healed.” I laughed! If I am healed, then why do I still see the evidence of this devastating disease? Why do I still have high blood pressure, excess facial hair, insulin resistance, lack of ovulation and long cycles? Why am I constantly staring at one pink line, never two? I couldn’t possibly be healed!
At least…not yet…
It wasn’t too long after that morning, while in prayer that I realized the voice I had been listening to, the one telling me I wasn’t healed yet, was my adversary. Satan. The father of all lies feeding me the lie that my healing of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) was a work to be completed rather than already finished. Isaiah 53:5 says that by His wounds we ARE healed. It doesn’t say we might be…will be…could be…but ARE. God wants you and I to know that what we desperately need Him to do for us has already been done. Jesus’ finished work at the cross satisfied the Father’s heart. And so from heaven’s throne came the pronouncement, “It is done!” in response to Jesus’ cry, “It is finished!” on earth.
Today, I no longer focus on what I see or feel, or the presence of contradicting reports. I now realize and remind myself that they are just lies from the enemy. And though they are real, very real, I know that they are temporal and not the Truth. God’s Word is Truth and when you and I start believing only what He says about our situations, then change begins to happen. I am living proof of this as I can testify that once I began believing and even declaring the Truth that by His stripes I am already healed, even though I had zero evidence to prove it, my cycles slowly became much shorter and ovulation started occurring naturally. The 15 hairs on my chin went to 10, and on some days, just a few. I even started noticing a change in my perspective. I no longer felt defeated or hopeless. But rather empowered and strong.
And so my question to you today is this: What do you see when it comes to your healing? Do you see a finished work or a work that is yet to be completed? Because friends, we can’t look to our circumstances. We can’t listen to the voices of our fears, doubts, and worries. We can’t even look to the reports from our doctors as being the absolute truth. Instead, we need to look to the Cross. And we need to listen to the voice of our loving Father who is proclaiming, “It is done!” And we need to turn our ear to hear the sweet voice of His Son who is crying out, “It is finished!” Because sweet friend, it is. We are called to walk by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7). And faith says you are healed.
I wrote this article for the devotional book, Anchored in Hope, that was put together by Ali Forest but written by nearly 45 different women who have struggled or are currently struggling with infertility. If you are interested in purchasing this book in order to be encouraged by others walking the same journey – the failures, the loss, the grief, but also the triumphs and faith that carries us through it all, then don’t hesitate.
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If you are looking for a faith-based infertility community of other women who just “get it”, then head over to the *PRIVATE* Waiting for Baby Bird Support group for hope + encouragement. There you will find opportunities to ask for prayer, watch *LIVE* encouragement videos from me, author of “Waiting for Baby Bird”, as well as be able to share your heart with others on the same path, enter into exclusive giveaways, and so much more! So what are you waiting for? Find us here!
Hello, Elisha …
As I went to bed last night, I prayed that God would bring someone along my path that I could help … and I woke up to your blog post. As weird as that sounds, I had received a nudge to reach out to you before, but thought that you would think it odd … so, I didn’t. With this second nudge, I just can’t ignore.
Backing up … I found your blog as earlier this year I was processing my second miscarriage in 9 months. This was after a year-long journey with IVF last year, resulting in pregnancy last July and again in November. Sadly, both pregnancies ended, as well as my IVF journey and my dream to be a mother. My fertility issue is nothing but age. My eggs are just old, and unfortunately, my time has passed. Coming to this acceptance has been a difficult journey — and one that still catches my emotions at different points in time. In the end, I hold dear to my heart that my God is still good, and I know this was never His dream for me.
The reason for my reach-out is relative to your PCOS. I am a Health Coach. I also am a firm believer that our bodies are beautifully created to work a certain way, and when we are able to address the root causes of illness, then amazing healing can occur. I’ve done quite a bit of study on PCOS — not because I have it, but because I have come across those who have struggled with it AND have found healing by using natural supplements. As you know, PCOS is directly related to some underlying issues in your body
I didn’t realize that HBP was part of having PCOS…surprisingly that’s not one that my Drs told me about. But it would help explain a lot for me. I pluck hairs on my chin as well, sometimes I even have a few on my upper lip that I need to get rid of. So don’t feel alone in that one! PCOS is just evil, and it does horrible things to our bodies. I’m glad it sounds like your symptoms are starting to subside though!! I know I don’t comment a ton anymore, but I do think about you all the time!! I hope you’re all doing well!
I totally respect your path to want to be healed through God not through major fertility intervention but also imagine it must require a tremendous amount of faith to not take advantage of higher odd treatments in favor of God’s healing. Especially as you see people around you in blog land find their miracles. Just want you to know I think about you often and hope you have continued peace in your journey to baby. Xo
Thank you so much girl for your sweet words! For me, fertility treatments would never “heal” me. Give me a baby? Possibly. But heal? No. I have been told from several doctor’s that with the condition of PCOS, I would have a high risk pregnancy and it would not be healthy. In fact, I would likely miscarry before 24 weeks or my baby be born early and have complications. My “goal” is not a baby at this point. Rather itis to be healthy and healed so that having babies is no longer an issue…as well as the other symptoms. It’s not always easy but the roller coaster ride of fertility treatments was far harder on me than doing what I am doing now. I am currently seeing a holistic doctor and working with him on naturally regulating my hormones, blood pressure, and cholesterol. So far, I am doing better. Thank you so much for commenting. It’s always so good to hear from you ❤❤❤
Sounds like an amazing plan. I have so much hope for your healing. I just started acupuncture (turns out I have endo now too) and it really seems to help ease my symptoms and make my lining grow better. I also went gluten and dairy free which was super hard at first but now easier. Wishing you love on this journey to healing.
I am soooo late in replying to your comment! YIKES! But how are things going? Acupuncture still helping?
Thank you so much for this post. So often when I hear people say things like “Just BELIEVE you are healed and you will be,” my heart translates that as “just PRETEND you are healed and you will be…” I can’t say the doctors are wrong in what they have told me about my body. When my body is shouting at me that it is still sick and not right, I cannot pretend to be well, especially because it diminishes the weight and the pain and the loss we have walked through and are walking through. But you are so right – my present circumstance is only temporary! Praise God, it truly is about our perspective and about hope! I believe that Jesus Christ has provided for my healing, and He could transform my body in an instant! And we DO have the absolute confidence that one day we will be perfect as He is, and I will try my best to wait for that day (whenever it may be) from a place of confidence, trust, and HOPE! And we know that when our hope is in the Lord it will never disappoint.
Thanks for this reminder!
Hey girl! Thank you so much for commenting! Having faith in your healing isn’t about “pretending” the illness isn’t there. It is simply about not focusing on it or coming into “agreement” with it and instead focusing on God and coming into agreement with what His word says is Truth. Faith believes in something without seeing the evidence or proof of it. I am so glad that you found this post an great reminder! Keep speaking healing, wellness, and wholeness over your body…never lack! Our words have power 🙂
One of my fave topics! Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for sharing. Your words are so powerful!
Sweet friend…believing fully that “He who began a good work in you will be FAITHFUL to COMPLETE IT in Christ Jesus!” He is not done with you yet! And He can bring you a baby even with all those icky PCOS symptoms.
Truly amazing
Ahh thanks girl! Xo
This is an amazing story. After being diagnosed 2 yrs ago with stage iv endometriosis I was in denial. My entire family never had an issue with fertility why would I. I lost my first baby at 10 weeks…it was the worst day I can remember. Lost my 2 baby at 5 weeks, even worse pain. Now a year and a half later and 3 diff. Fertility doctors I was diagnosed with MTHFR a clotting disorder. With treatment i shouldnt miscarry anymore. It took over year to get pregnant, and then it ended as a chemical pregnancy. I was so mad at God, I wanted nothing to do with prayer. That night I found myself praying again…begging, thanking, and trusting him again. I know he has a plan, I know I will be a mother one day one way or another. I never attended church or prayed and this has brought me close to him, I just have to remember to stop letting satan in.
Beautiful. Your faith in God is so wonderful to see. It has made me reach my point of understanding and moving forward with Him by my side in my difficult quest with Premature Ovarian Failure. I’ve come closer to Him and realize the path I want (biological children) might not be his path. And I’m ok with that now. Feeling that peace from Him is a most wondrous feeling. Thank you for sharing your story and your faith!
This is beautiful! Thank you for sharing. I needed to be reminded to not look at my circumstances but at the Hope that comes through Jesus.
Thank you for being so open and honest! It’s comforting to know I’m not alone! Thanks for the encouragement!
I see the Lord’s provision….a few months back I would daily pray for a specific request….just a word from the Lord. Then the next day He would speak through His word. I mean exactly what I was praying for….even on the days when my behavior towards PCOS and all that it is (yes even the chin hairs), God speaks!! Even during the storms Jesus is walking on the water! God is so much bigger and greater than PCOS. We just have to have faith and ask Him to move that mountain! Much love sweet sisters!!!!
Your faith is so amazing! I believe he will make you (and all of us ladies who continue to struggle) wonderful mothers someday. He’s preparing a miracle for us all. The day when we see those two pink lines..aww man I can’t imagine the feeling but its gonna be more than great. We will over come this one-day when fertility issues were something of our past,but in our minds still feel for those continuing to struggle. Satan will not win this battle, he won’t unless we let him. God is preparing something special. I know it!!
Thank you so much for being such an inspiration.
As a fellow PCOSer this article hit me squarely between the eyes. Especially since I deal with Every. Single. Symptom you listed! And the facial hair (talk about lowering your self-esteem!) But you’ve added a uniquely different perspective. One I needed since I so often beg God to just heal my body of these issues! Thanks for sharing your heart, and being so open and vulnerable to us all! 🙂
You are always so encouraging, praying for you sweet sister.
Encouraging thanks!
This is very encouraging. I hope that I can have faith like you in all that lies ahead! Thank you for your words!
Thanks for this post! It can be so easy to look at infertility as a never-ending battle that I’m not winning, but turning to my Savior has brought me peace and hope time and time again.
Thank you for being a kind voice to help chase away the evil voices.
THANKYOU for ministering to others.
For a minute there is thought you were writing my story.
God calls us to believe and trust. Believe me it’s a fight every day to see beyond what I. To look off in the distance and squint my eyes and see the shape of my precious baby.
I press to see Him promises…His finished work.
Yet every month that goes by…no baby. It’s been 9 years of trying and still no baby.
But I believe and trust in God and if he can give Hanna, Sarah and Elizabeth a child surely He can do that for me.
So I press, believe and trust.
#itisdone
This is so true!! We are sometimes so focused on what we want in this life that we forget our focus needs to be on the eternal. We are already healed. No matter what happens here good or bad, what we wanted or not… We are healed and our promises will be fulfilled in heaven. Maybe physical healing will come in this life and maybe it won’t. Maybe I will have a baby on earth and maybe I will only get to see my babies in heaven. One thing is for certain, I am the healed daughter of a king and he won’t ever forsake me.:-)..or you.:-) th an you for your words.
So beautifully said! I have come to terms with God showing my husband and me that we’re supposed to adopt, but that doesn’t change the fact that I believe He can still open my womb if He so chooses. Thank you for sharing your heart and faith with so many others who are struggling!
Elisha!!! You are absolutely amazing and definitely God sent. You’ve really helped me cling to God like never before. Anchored in hope will be my bible study theme for the next week.
Thank you for all that you do and be blessed today and always ❤️❤️❤️
Lots of love
Arlene (anchored in hope ⚓️)
This touched me on so many levels! Thank you for sharing your words, faith and encouragement! I always look forward to seeing your posts on FB and Insta! Praying for you! It is finished! 🙏🏻❤️
I say I don’t have to listen to the doubts of Satan, my God is truth always and forever!
My husband and I built a nursery in faith believing that God would fill it. Month after month when it doesn’t come to pass I have to stop myself from listening to the wrong voice too. I remind myself who my faith is in and listen to Steady My Heart/Kari Jobe and Thy Will/Hillary Scott (new one).
This is so beautiful. Everyday it’s a struggle between being okay with not conceiving and other days I feel broken and dysfunctional. Reading your posts and everything so inspirational it makes you want to be there for everyone because you know how it feels. God is in control of everything and I believe he has a story for us and he’s writing it as we can handle it and will bless us all with our happily ever ending 💜
Your encouragement is what I need to hear some days. Infertility is so hard. ❤️
This is a great article. My husband and I have been trying since October. I know, it’s only a few months. But struggling withe the fact that we haven’t conceived yet. Such an inspiration.
Thanks I feel that’s a great reminder and something I struggle to hold on to when I’m feeling overwhelmed.
It’s so easy to focus on what’s wrong with our bodies (trust me, I know…I have hypothyroidism) but I have been learning to appreciate my body and thank God for what it can do and try not to focus on the things it struggles with. It’s not always sunshine and rainbows for sure but by focusing on what it can do right now and what God can do with it in his time, it helps me cope with our 5 year struggle to conceive…
Your words seem to speak right to my soul. Everytime I’m feeling down I go to your page. You are such an encouragement to me and you fill me with hope! You are a gift from God, and I’m so thankful I stumbled across your page!
Ahh you are so sweet! You just put a smile on my face today. Thank you ❤❤
This spoke to me in so many ways. You are incredible and I so appreciate your help through our journey!
So thankful this spoke to you! And thank you for your sweet words! ❤
I love this post. Thank you for sharing and helping others to realize that God will provide when He knows we are ready!
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment ❤❤
Wow what an amazing entry so glad I came to read it. Not sure where I am on this infertility journey all I know of is time is running out. I have been so depressed I have gained weight and am just miserable no idea how to get out of the slump.
Beautifully written. Thank you so much for your words of encouragement!
Just what I needed to hear today. Thank you.
This is so spot on. Your blog & words continue to inspire & help me heal. God Bless you!
Thank you so much for the love you have shared with so many of us! You’re truly a blessing to me! 💖
This was so touching. I was diagnosed January of this year and it’s been a rough road in a short time. Your posts are always such a breath of fresh air to renew my hope and drive to keep my eyes on the prize.. Thank you.
Your walk of faith is inspiring. Right now I’m going through a “throw the towel in” phase. I feel defeated and hollow. Thank you for sharing your journey. It truly is a blessing to me.
Seriously have tears in my eyes! Thank you for this!
What truth! Itbis finished. I hear these lies so frequently instead of relishing in the turth of Christ.
Love this! 🙂
This is amazing. Your strong faith in God inspires me!
I love reading your blogs and Facebook post, we’ve been trying to conceive for 9 years so this stuff gives me Hope!! 💞💞
Love this! You faith inspires me as I continue to walk this journey ❤️