“I really hate to bother you, and I am sure you get tons of messages like this, and I might even be overstepping my boundaries. Therefore if this offends you, I am sorry, but have you ever tried, heard of, or thought about (insert baby-makin’ piece of advice).”
And every time, I smile a little and nod.
Because yes, I have tried Plexus. Yes, I have heard about NaPro. And yes, I have thought about (and tried) a Keto diet. Not to mention, I have also heard of that oil, used that cream, and taken that vacation to “just relax.”
Oh! And no, I am not offended by your message. Nor am I bothered by your profound words of “wisdom.”
That’s right. I am not offended. And you are not bothering me. Not in the least bit.
Every time I receive “advice” to boost my fertility or improve my overall health, I realize that at that moment, I can either take offense to it or take it as an opportunity to seek the Lord. As for me, I always choose the latter. Because what if God is using that person to speak to me? What if I have tried, or thought about, or heard of something they mentioned, and while it didn’t “work” once (or several times before), it will now? And it is because the time for “such advice” is now. Or perhaps when I was first presented with this piece of advice days, months, or years before and I didn’t feel led to pursue it because it wasn’t part of His plan for me at that moment in my life, but yet, it is part of His plan for me now, shouldn’t I at least explore the thought?
When trying to conceive, I know how hard it is to receive advice from others. Especially if they have never walked in your shoes. It’s even harder when you have literally tried everything, including but not limited to: expensive medical treatments, drastically changing your diet to lettuce only, drinking the fertility-enhancing smoothies that cost an arm and a leg to make, choking down the buckets of vitamins every morning, noon and night, while also gagging on the okra water because Dr. Google said it *could* have the potential of balancing your hormones. I realize it sounds like a lot, right? But that’s not all you have tried because I realize some of you are now acrobatic gymnasts as you have also attempted (and perfected) the art of standing on your head while doing “the bicycle” in the air after having (business-not pleasure) sex because once again, Dr. Google said it could help.
But here is the thing (my daddy starts every sentence like this when he has something important to say), I don’t want to be so closed off that I am not going into every day, every situation, every circumstance, and even every piece of advice someone is giving me with my fists (and my heart) closed; not open and willing to receive. Because what if…what if…God sent this person to me? And what if He is trying to speak words of wisdom through them? I don’t want to miss out.
So sweet sister, if you want to share advice with me, do it. And do it without reservation. I don’t care what it is. It could be a new fad diet I have tried a bazillion times. A smoothie recipe that your sister’s cousin, who was twice removed, claims without a shadow of doubt helped her conceive. Or perhaps it is a supplement you took only once, but bada-bing-bada-boom, after years of struggling, you finally saw those two precious pink lines. And I don’t even care if you think I should dunk my head in a snow drift several times after drinking from a plastic cup backward. Because, after all, wasn’t Naaman healed of leprosy after being told by the prophet Elisha to dip in the Jordan River 7 times if he wanted to be cleansed? The advice sounded ludicrous and not your typical avenue of healing, but nonetheless, it worked.
So once again, if you feel led to share your profound words of wisdom, a tip, or a trick that seemed to work for you or a friend, know this: I won’t guarantee that I will take it and use it. But I will guarantee that I will take it to the Lord, and I will let Him use it to lead, guide, and show me if it is something I should consider.
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