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To the One Feeling Distant from God

I see her. She is hurting after multiple miscarriages. She is physically, emotionally, and spiritually in pain. She has lost hope as she slowly feels herself sink beneath her anguish and the waves of despair crash over her, pulling her under. Her faith is weakening, and she is struggling to see the goodness of the Lord. She searches to hear His voice but feels forsaken. She longs for His touch but feels nothing. 

My heart has been heavy for her, and while praying today, the Lord began to speak to me on her behalf; but as I heard Him, I began to run it through my own filter and question what I was hearing. However, I then heard him say, “Just write,” and once I put my pen to paper and ignored my own thoughts, I could barely keep up. Then out of nowhere, in my messy handwriting and panic to not miss a single word, my pen just stopped, and it was over. He was done.

This is what He spoke:

My beautiful daughter, you search day and night for a sign from me, and you long to hear me speak, yet here I am right inside your Bible that sits idly on your table. Within each page is My word that comes alive and my voice, which speaks to your heart and circumstances. Please don’t neglect it. Please don’t run away from it because it is true. My word has the power to change the course of your life. It is medicine and life to all those who find it and believe in it (Proverbs 4:20-22). However, just like medicine on earth can take time to heal, so can My word. Sometimes doctors will “up” the dosage to bring healing; I ask you to “up” your dosage of Me and My word.

Do not let the floodwaters engulf me or the depths swallow me up, or the pit close its mouth over me. Answer me, O Lord; in your great mercy, turn to me. Do not hide your face from your servant; answer me quickly, for I am in trouble. Come near and rescue me…” Psalm 69: 15-18

Rise early each morning and meet quietly with Me. Trust in Me as you pour out your heart, for I am your safe dwelling place (Psalm 62:8). Bring me all of your hurts, worries, fears, and hesitations. I wait desperately for you to tell them to me. I already know about them, but I need to hear them from you. Don’t be scared or ashamed when you come because nothing you can do or say will make me turn my face or love you any less. Therefore, don’t hold back because I can’t heal your broken heart, and we can’t break down the wall you have built until you do.

Save me, O God, for the waters have come up to my neck. I sink in the miry depths, where there is no foothold. I have come into the deep waters; the floods engulf me. I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched. My eyes fail looking for my God. Psalm 69:1-3

You often cry out, “Don’t you see me suffering?!” And the answer is yes. I see the waters coming up to your neck, but know that I won’t let them engulf you. I will restore your life (Romans 8:28). From the depths of the earth, I will bring you up.

I promise. You have my promise.

Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once again. Psalm 71:20


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