During this past week, I have slowly watched her lose her strength and spunky attitude. I have watched as her body has gone limp and her breathing has slowed…sometimes stopped. I have watched as her eyes go from slowly opening for a few seconds at a time to not opening at all. In fact, it’s been four days since I have seen those beautiful brown eyes look up at mine. Our conversations have only consisted of me talking and her occasionally nodding “yes” or “no” to my questions or stories. It’s been one long week of me looking back over the years and torturing myself with all of the things I wished I had done or said when I had the chance. It’s been one long week.
But as this long week has come to a close and a new season has started here on earth today, the final chapter to my Grandma’s life has also come to a close, and a new season with a new life has begun for her in heaven. She has had one long week, and I’m excited for her and thankful for the joy and relaxation I know she is experiencing. She always had the biggest and most beautiful smile, and I can’t imagine how much bigger it just got.
I’m also thankful God allowed me to have one more Friday lunch date with her yesterday. Did she eat with me? No. Did she tell me stories or talk about what the neighbors have been doing? No. Did she wave goodbye and say “Come back” as I drove away? No. But what she did do was flicker her eyelids and let out a big sigh as I stroked her forehead and reminded her it was Friday and what I had brought us for lunch. I believe that even though it wasn’t a typical Friday afternoon lunch date, she still enjoyed my company as she peacefully listened to my stories.
I will miss the moments we had together on earth, but I know the time we spent with each other is just a short speck compared to the eternity I will one day have with her in heaven. I look forward and can’t wait until our next lunch date as she talks non-stop about what she has been doing and who she has been talking to while she was waiting for me. My sneaky suspension is that when I arrive in heaven, I will find her to be the woman in charge of feeding all the animals, and when she finally sees me again, she will drop everything to tell me all the details about her new neighbors. I believe she might even already have a plate full of bologna sandwiches, her homemade pimento cheese spread, sour cream, and onion Pringles, and half a banana ready for me. My fingers are crossed that she will have made her famous upside-down pineapple cake too. I may have had one long week, but thinking of the day when we reunite gives me peace and makes me giddy inside.
I love you, Grandma, and I’m going to miss you and the fun you brought to my life. We were like two peas in a pod, and I’m going to miss you in my pod. I’m also going to miss the random and off-the-wall gifts you put in our Christmas stockings each year, but don’t you worry; I will make sure I pick up where you left off. Cans of black olives, Sudoku puzzles with instructions to only use them in the bathroom, chip clips, toothpaste, and cute cat calendars will always be found underneath the family Christmas tree. I promise that bologna sandwiches will always be eaten with the memory of you; orange slices will readily be available in my house. As long as my husband doesn’t catch me, no stray animal will ever go hungry in my backyard. It’s been one long week, but I’m thankful for the life you have lived and the memories we have made. Until we meet again…
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