Because the room itself doesn’t match where I am in my life. It only matches where I want to be and where my sweet dreams take me at night.
Not many even know this room exists. And to be honest? I like to keep it that way. Because like I said, it’s odd.
Do you see the dresser/changing table to the left? Nearly a year ago my friend was selling her son’s baby changing table/dresser on Facebook. I immediately fell in love with it and impulsively bought it before someone else commented and “snatched” it up. But immediately after staking my claim, I felt absolutely ridiculous when two of my other friends commented that if I changed my mind, they wanted to be next in line for it. These were two friends who had ultrasound pictures to show…heartbeats to hear…reasons to actually need it in a few short months. But me? I didn’t. And so purchasing it? Well, it was odd.
And look over there in the corner. Do you see the recliner? My husband and I bought it nearly 10 months ago in preparation that we would not only need it, but hopefully need it soon. As in by the end of the year soon. But friends, it’s now the end of the year and I am nowhere closer to needing it than I was 10 months ago when we bought it. And so to see it sitting in a room next to a dresser/changing table that I also had no business purchasing? Well, it’s odd.
But then again so is that crib over to the right. Do you see it? It’s the one I purchased two years ago. The one my heart told my head I needed to buy because it was time to prepare. If you look closely you will see that it has the most beautiful crib bedding, hand sewn with faith and love by my talented mother already placed on the inside. It’s gorgeous, yet to see it sitting there, month after month, empty of tiny fingers and wiggly toes, it’s odd.
Everything about this room is odd.
But isn’t that what faith looks like?
Isn’t it odd?
Isn’t it odd to carry around plans and dreams in our hearts, and having those conversations and making those purchases that don’t seem completely congruent with where we are today? Yes. Yes, I believe it is. But you know? It’s okay. Because I was once told that faith in action is like a hand that reaches up and grabs a hold of the blessings from God.
Therefore while this might look odd to you and honestly even me, I’m okay with it. I don’t mind being odd. Because I would rather be odd and reaching, then normal and not.
“In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” ~James 2:17
“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” ~Hebrews 11:1
“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” ~Hebrews 11:6
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