My First Smile

It has been over a year since I quit spending wasting my money on Ovulation Prediction Kits. I didn’t see the point since I never saw a smiley face, a blinky face, or any other type of face besides my own pouty face after each test.  However, four weeks ago while shopping in Target and feeling hopeful for my upcoming cycle, I decided to lift my boycott and give them another go around.  I told myself (and the box) they had one last chance to flash me a smile.

smiley face

Therefore, in the last 20 days my morning ritual has consisted of me staggering to the bathroom, fumbling with the foil wrapper, grumbling at the foil wrapper for not opening, eventually opening the incredibly thick foil wrapper, before finally dropping my undergarments and then peeing on the expensive stick (all while thinking to myself how silly it is for me to pee on something worth so much).  Once the deed was done, I then returned to the bathroom five minutes later to see the same result I have seen for years…a circle.  I sometimes also perform the same routine (minus the staggering part) later in the afternoon ‘just in case’ the smiley face has decided to show up fashionably late.  Unfortunately, whether its 6am or 3pm, I have yet to see a smiley face.

That is until today…

Today, I changed up my morning ritual by adding an ‘extra step’. After staggering to the bathroom, fumbling with the foil wrapper, grumbling at the foil wrapper, and then finally opening the foil wrapper, I stopped. I stopped and I prayed. It was not a prayer of begging, but rather one in which I boldly approached my Poppa God and asked Him to do something only He could do and that was give me a smile.

Poppa God,

I come to you this morning and after 20 days of seeing nothing but a circle, I ask that you show yourself strong and bless me with a smiley face on this stupid test. Your word says in the book of Psalms that you hear my prayers and you will not reject my pleas; therefore, I am confident and hopeful to see my first smile today.

After the prayer, I continued my routine of dropping my undergarments, peeing on the expensive stick (while once again rolling my eyes at the foolishness of basically peeing on money), and then setting it on the counter before walking to my office. It was approximately ten minutes later when I heard my husband walk down the hallway and while standing in the doorway he said, “You got a smiley face.” I turned around and with a confused look on my face I said, “Uh?”  He once again repeated, “You got a smiley face.”  Still unsure as to what he was talking about, I responded with another (but more aggravated) “Uh?” However as he began to repeat, “You got a smiley face” for the third time, my hands flew over my mouth as I remembered the test, the prayer, and the smile I so desperately wanted to see. As tears began to quickly fill my eyes, all I could say was, “It did?! You can see a smile?” He nodded his head yes and I could hardly believe it!

photo(39)

As I ran to the bathroom to look at the smiley face with my own two eyes, I realized I had no idea what a smiley face meant, I just knew I wanted one. Therefore, after digging the box out of the bathroom cabinet, I began reading the instructions and discovered that since I had a circle (no chance of ovulation at this time) yesterday, I should have had a blinky smiley face (ovulation coming soon) today and then possibly a solid smiley face (get jiggy with it because ovulation is happening now) tomorrow; however, not me!  I went straight from a circle yesterday to a solid smile today. I started to panic and get aggravated thinking maybe my body and hormones were still wacky, but then I remembered my prayer and started to laugh at myself. I should have been more specific because I did not ask God for a blinky smiley face, I simply asked Him for a smile and that’s exactly what He gave me.

It has been hours since I first saw my ‘smile’ and I still get chills thinking about the power of prayer. I also cannot stop thinking about James 4:2 which says, “You do not have because you do not ask.” I know it sounds simple, but we have to pray and ask for what we want or need. I don’t do that. I don’t pray. Do not get me wrong, I do pray and I pray a lot, but I do not pray for me. Instead, I am praying for my friends who are also waiting for their breakthrough, or the woman I heard who needs healing. I am praying for Goldilocks and her Mama or for those who have lost all hope and those who have never found it.

I am praying for others and seeing my prayers answered, which is great, but I am not praying for myself and as a result, my life is not changing. For months I have not prayed for my baby bird to make his appearance soon. I have quit praying for my cycles to become regular (or at the very least shorter than 70 days) and I cannot remember the last time I prayed for ovulation to start taking place. Many of you might be asking, “Well, why the heck not?!?” I too began asking myself that very same question today and the answer was very clear and simple. I do not pray for myself because sometimes I forget, but mostly because I feel as though if I have worked the situation over in my mind, talked about it long enough with others, complained about it with my husband, or even blogged about it for the world to read, then its the same thing as prayer. But thinking, hoping, and talking with others is not prayer, only talking with the Father is prayer.

So today, take a lesson from me and do not let your prayerlessness hinder God from working in your life. Boldly come to Him with your requests because He is waiting to also give you a smile today (and no I don’t mean the one on the ovulation prediction test, unless of course that’s what you need). 

“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.”  Matthew 7:7 (NLT)


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160 thoughts on “My First Smile

  1. OMGOODNESS! That is so awesome. He really does answer prayers. Hopefully that is just one good sign of this month. Hoping you get your BFP this month. I am so happy for you and seriously it gave me the chills too. God has blessed you with a smiley face. 🙂

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    • I still get the chills when I think about it!! I pray for others and see their dreams coming true and wonder…”why not me too?” Ummm…well, duh!! I am not praying for myself too! Things are changing from now on 🙂

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      • You are so kind, thinking of others before yourself. I am glad you are taking charge and including yourself in those prayers. You deserve it just as much as they do!

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      • Thank you so much. I am truly blessed to have you in my life. I pray for you and the others too. I find myself praying all the time these days. I use to pray about twice a day. Now it is almost a constant prayer.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Congrats on the smiley face! I remember my first smiley face so fondly… it happened in the restroom at the Mall of America around 2pm. It was everything I could do to not drag my hubby home immediately to get busy… I don’t get a positive every month, but I do see a temperature shift every month. Not really sure what that is all about… However my OPKs were free so I don’t mind using them. Like you I find it silly to pee on something so expensive but the pay off of seeing that smiley face is completely different level of elation. God provides blessings for all of us. We just need to trust in him. (Even though it is so hard sometimes)

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    • Amen and so true!!! I never have a temp shift…I quit doing that also. Maybe I will go ahead and start doing that just to see if it ever changes. The problem is when I don’t see shifts or changes I get discouraged. Sometimes for me to remain in faith and stay hopeful is not not track. But I’m so glad to see a smiley face 🙂

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      • I understand the extra stress that monitoring brings… I stop temping after I get a temp shift for 4 -5 days because I drive myself crazy analyzing what each days temperature means. Good luck to you. I pray for fabulous results!

        Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks sugars! I think your cycles are regular right? Mine are not. Some cycles are 36…the next month could be 53…the next will probably be 70….and the next 43….LOL! I seriously NEVER know.

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      • Yup, they are always every 28 days and I’m pretty sure I typically ovulate around the same time every month (based on some cramping and other symptoms not worth mentioning). But this month, I actually ovulated a week late and my cycle was very late. It would be completely frustrating to never know when AF is coming. I was freaking out about being a week late so I’m not sure how I would respond to having a 70 day long cycle – oh my goodness! Anyways, I just want you to know that I said a prayer for you this morning and was very specific in details 🙂 I’m looking forward to reading about your miracle

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      • oh you have just brought tears to my eyes! Thank you so much for your kindness and praying for me! Love you lots and I’m so blessed to know you and have you stormin the gates of heaven for me! xo

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  3. Praying for you! I conquered infertility and PCOS. And so can you! In the name of Jesus, I SPEAK life into Elisha’s womb. Abundant life! I pray that baby grows to full term with zero complications. It is done, in Jesus name! AMEN!!!

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  4. Elisha, that was, hands down, one of THE most powerful posts I have read in a long time! Thank you for bringing so much hope to all of us!

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  5. Happy tears for you!! Praying… Asking… Begging Poppa God to fill your womb with life this month!! Big hugs to you today!!
    Blessings, Amy

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  6. I was so incredibly happy for you to read this post and the first thought that popped into my head was how wonderful that God is working so visibly in your life. I’m crossing all fingers and toes, and I also said a little prayer for you this evening x

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  7. I actually just posted on Facebook a quote from the unveiled wife… It said “have you prayed about it, as much as you have talked about it?” Very convicting.. It’s so easy to pray for others and neglect ourselves. I just started a 10 week devotional by Beth Moore called whispers of hope. Great little Devo.. Praying for you and the little blessing The Lord is working on..

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  8. I’ve never done one of those because I’m so irregular, I’ve thought what’s the point. I’m super excited for you!! Praying that this cycle is it, for God’s promise of Josiah to manifest. In Jesus name.

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    • I am also SUPER irregular. As in one cycle I will be 36 days, the next 57, and then maybe 72 before going back 39…ugh! I encourage you to be specific in your prayers. I am praying for you to have regular cycles 🙂

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      • Interesting you say that. Because a few days ago when my cycle started I felt like God was telling me to be very specific in my prayers this cycle. So much so that I looked up what happens each day in a ‘regular cycle.’

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      • wow! I don’t find that a coincidence! Something tells me God is giving you some tools to bring on your breakthrough 🙂 Very exciting! xo

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  9. So excited for you! I remember that exact feeling of the BEAUTIFUL smiley face of ovulation!!!! 🙂 Praying for that little bird to make it’s home in your tummy for the next 9 months!!!

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  10. Praise Jesus Elisha! I love that He answers our prayers! He cares about the little things – like a smiley face!! I LOVE that you got a smiley face! I have never peed on one of these, but I think they would be a lot better if it said PRAISE GOD – it’s time to get busy (like your other post)!!! Believing for babies – come on Jesus – we believe THIS will be the month!!! Love this. Such an exciting victory in a long journey!

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    • Yes it is Twiny! I only started peeing on them in the beginning (years ago) due to having such an irregular cycle…I never knew when I would ovulate but since I was never ovulating anyway, the tests were a waste of money. I’m so thankful to God for this smile! He is amazing!

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  11. YAY!!! After praying for what you want, don’t forget to give God an awesome dose of thanks and gratitude! (And how ironic it is smiling too!) That baby bird will be in the nest before you know it! Much love and prayer 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I love this prayer, so beautiful and simple. I’ve had the same thing happen, going from plain ol’ circle to smiley face without that inbetween face (same test)…..so I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Good luck girly, BD AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Praying for you!

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  13. Girl, I teared up when I read this. God is GOOD! Believing with you and praying for you. I’m so thankful that God is going to bless us with babies in our womb SOON!

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  14. Wonderful news!!!! I’m excited about this! Thanks for sharing the lesson learned about praying for yourself. It was a good reminder for me. BTW,You crack me up all the time. I think you have a future on a comedy stage somewhere. 🙂

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  15. Oh gosh this is something wonderful to wake up and read Elisha! How wonderful… How great though that through this journey god is teaching you things also. In his perfect timing- but I’ve prayed it’s this month for you 🙂 xx

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  16. It’s always so exciting when you get a positive test! I also stopped wasting my money on ovulation tests after we discovered DH didn’t have enough swimmers. I use BBT to keep track of my cycle now. I really do it so I know when I will get my period, not so much for when I ovulate anymore 😦

    I’m keeping you in my prayers! This will be your month!

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  17. Oh, yay!!!! SO encouraging when something seems to work right:) And even better when you know it was a direct answer to prayer! Good job being obedient! For some reason, I was expecting you to have some great news for us last month…not sure if that was just me wanting it for you, or if God is getting ready for something big! Saying lots of prayers for you, sister! Keep up the same for yourself, and sweet baby Josiah!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Elisha, that is awesome! I am so happy and hopeful for you. I too have long cycles and have never gotten a clear positive on an opk, but I started seeing a specialist a couple months ago (a week after i read the book you sent me and as a direct result, I felt led to) and I was on day 16 of my cycle and I told the doctor “normally I don’t ovulate regularly, but I believe I ovulated on day 15”. Sure enough, we were able to see the corpus luteum and everything via US. So promising, and good to know I’ve become that in tune with my body. Also verified it with a progesterone test on day 20. I was so elated – God, please continue healing my fertility! I will take your lesson and be specific in my prayers, and will continue to pray for your success!

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  19. What an awesome post and reminder to all of us. I am so grateful for this message bc I have fallen into the same category…please know that I will be saying a prayer for me and you! God Bless!!!!!

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