The Pep Talk

Laughing Your Way Through Infertility:  The Pep Talk

If you have been reading my blog for very long then it should be no secret that I strongly believe in the power of your words. (Check out my blog post, “Shut Your Pie Hole” by clicking here)  In fact, one of my favorite books is “Change Your Words Change Your Life” by Joyce Meyer.  Furthermore, one of my favorite scriptures is when Jesus says in Matthew 7:20 that if I have faith as small as a mustard seed, the mountains in my life will move when I command them to move.  So imagine the talks me and my mountains…errr…ovaries, fallopian tubes, hormones, and eggs have on a regular basis.

bird open mouth

“Okay ovaries, LISTEN UP. This month is going to be different. You are going to snap to attention, produce the biggest eggs my body has ever seen and then FORCEFULLY eject them.  Do NOT hang on to them!  They are not for you to keep!  DO YOU HEAR ME?!”

“Uterus. I don’t know what you are doing in there, but I’m going to need you to stop it, and start growing a lining like you are a bear stocking up for hibernation, kabish? Have you ever heard of a hysterectomy? You are THIS close my friend, shape up or get SHIPPED OUT”

“Eyeballs. You keep those tears contained. If I so much as feel a rogue TINGLE in that tear duct when I see another pregnant woman or hear of another pregnancy announcement, I promise I will pop you out with a spoon. Keep it together. This is your final warning!”

“FAAAALLOOOOPIAN TUBES!!! HELLOOOO IN THERE!! Do you speak English? No seriously, what are you doing in there? Partying? Napping? Putting up barricades as a prank?  Can we talk about this whole sperm/egg blind date thing you should be coordinating? No? Get busy hooking them up!  Got it?!”

“Eggs!  I need you to be better than Egglands Best!  You are instructed to be happy, healthy and free from all chromosome abnormalities.  I’ve got some high standards and I need you to fulfill them and be PERFECT!  Don’t make me get angry!”

“Hormones!  What is your malfunction?  You seem to be on a roller coaster.  One cycle you are going up, the next cycle you are crashing down. Let’s get it together and be balanced for once, okay?  Estrogen I need you to pull it together.  Progesterone, wake up!  Insulin, let’s come down a bit; there is no need to be an overachiever.  No if’s, and’s or but’s about it!”

“Listen here spermies!  You better wake up, bulk up and get moving. Got it?! It’s time you start reading the road map, following all road signs and head in the right direction!  There is one very anxious eggy waiting for you and you better not let it down. It’s time to swim like you are Micheal Phelps! Mmkay?”

say sir yes sir

I believe the pep talks I give myself while in the shower, washing the dishes, sweeping the front porch, and dusting the living room bookshelf would either win me the grand prize on Americas Funniest Home Videos or put me in the insane asylum…What about you? Do you give yourself “pep talks?”

Special thanks to The Almost Mom for letting me use some of her “pep talks”

 

 

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54 thoughts on “The Pep Talk

  1. For the daddies- “Listen spermies, you better wake the heck up, bulk up and get moving. Got it?? There is one very anxious eggy waiting for you and you better not let it down. It’ll get ugly up in dere, mmkay?”

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  2. Your awesome, girl! Loved this. Made me laugh and I desperately needed to laugh today. Definitely going to start using this one on my uterus…”Have you ever heard of a hysterectomy? You are THIS close my friend, shape up or get SHIPPED OUT”

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  3. Hehehe, I like the added ones! Thank you for sharing my blog, and for the reminder that the impact of our words can be as physically healing as it is emotionally! 🙂 Shouting out a pep talk for SURE today!

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    • oh yes! It gives such an sense of empowerment and Jesus always said to talk to our mountains and not about them. So talk away girl! Use your God given authority 🙂

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  4. I just found your blog through another blog I’ve been following. I love the pep talk! I have PCOS as well and I find myself trying to convince my body to work. We’ve been TTC for almost three years now, and we lost our twin boys in January. PCOS is such a pain! Thanks for writing this!

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    • Yay! So glad you found me! Yes PCOS is a pain I my rumbus but I won’t let it overcome me and I am believing it won’t get the best of you either! I hope you enjoy reading through some past posts for encouragement! Xo

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  5. Our pastor just preached a message about this and about the power of our words. I pep talk myself often – “Natalie, you can do this..” and try to be aware of what I say. It is something I consistently need to work on. We don’t realize the things we say like, “Oh my head is killing me” or, “Man, we are broke…” and things of that nature…but words have the power to shape our destiny. “Out of the abundance of our heart, the mouth speaks..” Luke 6:45 Words are so powerful and people do not even realize it. This post is a great reminder on that! xoxo

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  6. God has been speaking to me all day about “speaking life” into my health! Then I logged on and read your pep talk posts. Total confirmation!
    -KT
    P.S. You can’t say “pep talk” without making me think of Kid President’s pep talk video. If you haven’t seen it, you have to watch! I love that kid. I want to adopt him but apparently he already has a family. (lame)

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    • This kiddo is so cute!!!! I agree that this is total confirmation to speak only healthy, life and wholeness. Did you read the “Shut Your Piehole” post?

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      • I did. It’s pretty much 100% of the things that I have been thinking about today. I’m trying to challenge myself to take the time I invest in focusing on my infertility and invest it in praising him for my healing and future babies. I need to put my money where my mouth is!

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